How to Recognise and Reset a Dysregulated Nervous System

A grounded guide to self-awareness and balance

GUIDES

Zak Zango

4 min read

Sections:

1. Introduction

We all have moments when life feels too much: a sudden spike in anxiety, the fog of exhaustion, or the quiet sense that we’re not quite here. Often, these are signs that our nervous system is off balance. Learning to recognise these states and respond with care can make a meaningful difference to how we move through the world.

This guide isn’t about fixing or controlling your feelings, instead its about tuning it. Getting familiar with your nervous system is a way of getting closer to yourself, maintaining calm and working with yourself more empathetically.

2. Two Sides of the Nervous System

Your autonomic nervous system is the part of you that runs in the background: regulating heart rate, digestion, breathing, and more. It has two main branches:

The Sympathetic Nervous System (SNS) – Often called “fight or flight,” it mobilises energy in response to danger. Think racing heart, shallow breathing, tense muscles.
The Parasympathetic Nervous System (PNS) – Sometimes referred to as “rest and digest,” it brings your body back to safety. Slower heart rate, deeper breaths, a sense of ease.

A healthy system can shift between the two depending on your environment. But sometimes we get stuck i.e: ‘revved up’ or ‘shut down’, and that’s when we start to struggle.

3. Signs You Might Be Stuck in Sympathetic Overdrive (Fight/Flight)

In this state, your body is primed for action. Even if there’s no real threat, your system feels like there is. You might notice:

Tasks feel unmanageable, even small ones like replying to a message
A loop of avoidance and guilt: “I should be doing this, but I can’t”
Heightened emotions: anger, tearfulness, or snapping at others
A strong pull to withdraw socially, often from fear of judgement
Racing thoughts that won’t settle
Physical tension: clenched jaw, tight shoulders, restlessness

This is often mistaken as laziness or failure but thats just a lens, it’s really your system doing its best to protect you. But when it becomes chronic, it can leave you depleted and overwhelmed.

4. Signs of Parasympathetic Overwhelm (Freeze/Shutdown)

After long periods of stress, your system might flip into the other extreme—a kind of collapse, picture the marathon runner who has been giving it their all for 26 gruelling miles only to fall to the floor upon . Rather than feeling agitated, you might feel flat or unreachable:

Saying no to even small tasks because everything feels too much
Difficulty making decisions, even simple ones
Withdrawing from others—even people you usually enjoy
A loss of motivation or connection to things that used to matter
A numb, distant, or “switched off” feeling

This freeze state is also a survival response. It’s your system trying to conserve energy. But over time, it can feel like life is passing you by.

5. Awareness as the First Step

Learning to spot which state you’re in helps you choose what kind of care you might need. If you’re activated, calming practices may help. If you’re shut down, gentle stimulation might serve better.

There’s no one-size-fits-all method, but below are a few approaches that many find helpful. The key is to experiment, go slowly, and listen to your body.

6. Techniques to Rebalance

1. Cold Water Exposure

Stimulates the vagus nerve and helps bring your system back into balance.

Splash cold water on your face, especially near the eyes and temples
End a warm shower with 30–60 seconds of cold water
Place a cold pack on your chest or neck
Submerge hands or feet in cold water if a full shower feels too much

Start gently and work up—cold exposure can be surprisingly regulating.

2. Vagus Nerve Stimulation

The vagus nerve is a key player in calming your body. Try:

Humming or chanting (vibrations help activate the nerve)
Gargling water for 30–60 seconds
Deep belly breathing—inhale for 4, hold for 2, exhale for 6–8

These small practices, done consistently, can shift your baseline.

3. The Physiological Sigh

A powerful, natural reflex that quickly reduces stress.

Take a full deep breath in through your nose
Top it off with a second short inhale
Slowly exhale through your mouth
Repeat 2–3 times

Use this when you feel tension building in your body.

4. Progressive Muscle Relaxation

Gives your body a chance to release stored tension.

Starting at your feet, tense a muscle group for 5–10 seconds
Then release fully and move up the body

This technique can be helpful when your body feels clenched or on alert.

5. Box Breathing (Square Breathing)

A structured breathing practice that promotes calm.

Inhale for 4 counts
Hold for 4
Exhale for 4
Hold again for 4

Repeat for a few minutes to create space in your body and mind.

6. Grounding Exercises

Helps bring your attention back to the present.

5-4-3-2-1 technique: name 5 things you see, 4 you feel, 3 you hear, 2 you smell, 1 you taste
Walk barefoot: on grass, earth, sand—notice the sensation

When your mind is racing or you feel far away from yourself, grounding can reconnect you.

7. Trigeminal Nerve Massage (under the eyes)

A gentle way to downshift your system.

Use light pressure or small circular motions under the eyes, near the cheekbones
Combine with deep breathing for extra effect

This can be especially useful if you’re feeling edgy or emotionally flooded.

7. Reflection Prompts

What tasks or interactions have felt especially draining lately?
Do you notice signs of burnout, activation, or shut-down?
When you're in those states, what do you tend to reach for? Are there practices here that might offer something different?

8. A Few Gentle Reminders

Practice regularly – your system learns through repetition.
Start small – it’s better to do a little often than a lot once.
Be patient – regulation is a slow reconditioning, not a quick fix.

Your nervous system isn’t broken. It’s just trying to help you survive. The more you listen, the more you’ll notice: it’s not trying to sabotage you, it’s asking for care.

9. Resources

The Body Keeps the Score by Bessel van der Kolk
Why Has Nobody Told Me This Before? by Dr Julie Smith
Apps like Calm, Headspace, Insight Timer (for guided breathwork)

Feel OK isn’t about becoming unshakeable. It’s about learning to notice when you’ve been shaken—and remembering that you can steady yourself again.